oh, family life

The world against the family, the ever-loving strangers knifing into private affairs with blades of thievery...that is the problems with giving birth to a child, they get you stuck and you have to pay. You might as well chain an anchor to your noodle legs and throw yourself off a dock for all the thanks and joy family life will give you.

My family life is terrible, and I didn't even start them up. They raised me. My mother is a tyrant, and there are numerous drunks sulking around with disasterous minds and tendancies that get them into these horrible situations that would be comic if they weren't so frequent and depraved. My aunt and grandmother fight like wild animals. I hear about this, and sigh. Nothing for me to do but watch the world fall apart. I try to tell them "Don't drink; alcohol is an instrument of genocide. Look at the natives." But nobody in my family listens to me except my grandfather. They think I am young and inexperienced, when in truth I am old and very experienced. It only takes a few experiences in order to solidify a world view, and a few more in order to know true morality paired with just and intelligent action. But many in my family are lacking in these experiences.

My father is a shallow man, obssessed with technologies that deaden the mind. He also is a hypocrite, incognizant of his own failings, and somehow he has all this money despite being on disability. There, you have another comedy.

I could illustrate these things to you, but it is better that I don't for I don't want to invoke pity, but just recognition of how terrible and crummy families truly are. They had me locked in a mental hospital, not because I became inconvinient, but because they needed a scapegoat for all their problems. Of course, they felt terrible soon after doing it, but while it was happening you would think that they were convinced that it was God's holy mission for them to lock their non-combative and non-suicidal son up in a mental hospital. Well, I did try to run away to a friends house. But at 24, seriously, you would call the police because of that? What a bunch of assholes.

Anyway, I suppose the larger issue is that my faith in the human race, and joyous love augmented with trumpets and harps and shit is waning slightly. I can love anyone, but when they fuck you over for no reason because it is of some strange symbolic advantage to them, then I think the love has got to stop. Love extenuated to far is a form of violence, when it seeks to trap and control an individual within a failing structure. Family is a sinking ship where nobody wants anybody to survive.